Asleep
by Bellatrix wannabe 89
Summary: Written for day three of OQ Movie Week; Inspired by 'Titanic'. "I'm glad I got off that lifeboat." Despite everything, despite my drowsiness, despite this overwhelming urge to fall asleep, I gave her a soft tired smile. "I wish you hadn't. But I'm glad I get to spend more time with you. I just wish we could have met somewhere else..." Outlaw Quee


I own no one but my own people

"Are you cold?"

I forced myself to shake my head, forced myself to hold back the shivering and the teeth chattering.

She gave up her spot on the lifeboat for me, she gave up a life of power and wealth with that psychopath Leopold White to be with me, some poor British thief with two kids by two different mothers.

The least I could do was not make her feel bad about staying on the door.

"I- I'm f- fi-ne." I close my eyes and wince. That wasn't exactly commanding confidence… I force my midnight blue lips into a smile. "I'm fine, Regina."

She didn't believe me. I could tell. Not only was I a horrible liar but she knew me far too well for that.

We only knew each other for five days, the day that I saved her life when she was considering ending it all because of her arranged fiancée who was old enough to be her father and her bitterly cold mother.

We only knew each other five days, and I already loved her. I already loved her, I already knew her, I would already be willing to die for her and she for me...

I already trusted her son Henry, a smart well behaved brilliant thirteen year old boy, with my children when I put them on the lifeboat next to him after sneaking them up from steerage before the doors locked behind us. Henry promised to look after my four year old Roland and my six month old Margot until we met up with them on the boat that was coming to rescue us all.

Only I don't think I was going to make it onto that boat...

Regina sniffling brought me out of my own thoughts and I turned to look at her. Ice clung to her skin, her long black hair was steamed with white and her tears froze on her cheek.

"I- I have to tell you something, Robin," she told me, her voice barely able to raise above a strained whisper. "I love y-."

"Stop. Regina, st- stop this." My voice was as firm as I could make it. I reached out and grabbed hold of her hand, bringing it to my blue lips and kissing it. "You're going to survive. You don't get to say yo- your goodbyes yet, you don't get to tell me that out of- out of desperation because we're gonna get a chance to say it to each other a hun- a hundred times a day when we're rescued."

More frozen tears ran down her face. "What if we don't?"

"We will. You, me, Henry and-... and Roland and Margot." My voice cracked at the name of my children but they were safe. They were in a lifeboat, they were on their way to the ship. I can't imagine anything different, anything worse happening to them.

"We're gonna be a family," I continued, ignoring the heavy blanket of drowsiness covering me. "All of us. Okay the-... the boats are coming and we're gonna get on it and we're gonna see our children again. I promise you…"

Regina looked at me with those brown eyes I fell in love with the first time I saw her on that upper deck, her lashes just thin fragile shards of ice. She looked at me before she reached out and kissed me.

Frozen lips moved against on frozen lips paining both of us as the chapped dry skin almost ripped while chattering teeth banged against chattering teeth.

It was the best kiss I ever had.

She laid her head down on the heavy wooden door and I rested my head on my arm while I took her hand, neither of us talking anymore, it took too much effort to.

Eventually the sounds of the other people died off. The yelling for the boats, the whistles, the crying… just a deathly still silence that me and her joined.

I was starting to get tired now. The pain had gone now and the water felt almost warm. I realized my hands no longer shook and my teeth no longer were chattering.

_Now would be the perfect time for another kiss_ I thought but I didn't voice that to Regina. I was too tired to talk, too tired to keep my eyes open, too tired to even keep myself holding onto that door. It would be so much easier to just slip beneath the choppy water and sleep than stay above it and keep my eyes open.

I just wanted to sleep...

"Robin?"

Regina. She was still awake… didn't she realize how much better it would be if she just slept alongside me?

"Robin?" she called out again. I slowly opened one eye only halfway and even that took most of my strength to do. But even looking at her with one eye halfway opened while a warm darkness crept in, she was still so beautiful.

"Hmm?"

"I'm glad I got off that lifeboat."

Despite everything, despite my drowsiness, despite this overwhelming urge to fall asleep, I gave her one last smile.

"I wish you hadn't." I was so, so tired. It was taking all my effort to speak but she had to know this. "But I'm glad I get to spend more time with you. I just wish we could have met somewhere else..

I saw her smile at me, the last thing I would ever see before I closed my eyes one last time…

I saw me and Roland saying goodbye to my Marian in that hospital bed. I saw a three day old Margot in a bassinet my doorstep with a note saying I was the father and the mother didn't want anything to do with her.

I saw both of them safe and happy and laughing, I saw my best mate John Little, who told me going to America would bring me nothing but trouble.

I should have listened to the man.

But the last thing I saw, the very last thing I pictured before the drowsiness and darkness overtook me completely, was Regina smiling while we danced,and her beautiful joyful laugh mixed with mine was the last thing I ever heard…

With that beautiful picture, and that heavenly sound firmly in my mind; I finally, finally, was able to sleep.

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